Novice Reflections
Bishop Sheen once pointed out that Christ’s life differed from every other man’s in this: that he did not walk this earth primarily to live, but to die. Every moment in Our Lord’s life involved a looking forward to that moment when he would reconcile the world to himself through the shedding of his blood, when he would take the devil’s most fearsome weapon—death—and defeat him by submitting to it. And that, of course, he did. Every Christian, then, is called to imitate Christ’s self-sacrifice by giving himself fully over to the Father’s will in the midst of his current circumstances—whatever the cost – that the Father may sanctify his efforts and raise them up unto bearing fruit for His kingdom.
After a year in the novitiate I am preparing to take simple vows along with two of my brothers on September 1st of this year. The discernment through the year has been very fruitful, full of rich blessings and also deeper self-examination, meditation and prayer on the meaning and purpose of life. I have been blessed with much time for study and prayer, whether in respect to the history of religious life and the Dominican Order in particular, or the nature of the vows of poverty, chastity and obedience, or my own delving into the riches of the Scriptures and various theological works; as well, our nightly Adoration before the Blessed Sacrament was a bedrock of the year, providing as it did time for Lectio Divina, private devotions, and reading of saints’ lives and treatises on the spiritual life.
Perhaps the biggest challenge during the year was that of learning to live in community. It almost sounds cliché, but living in a community of varied personalities in close quarters on a day-to-day basis demands virtues of you which you didn’t perhaps realize were so difficult before! We friars are, in a manner, a family, united not by blood by the more transcendent spiritual union of the Catholic faith and the Dominican charism; yet we are also earthen vessels and all in need of redemption, pruning, sanctification, and growth in virtue on a daily basis. For this reason St. Dominic saw community as the perfect context in which to cultivate preachers of the gospel. Not only does one reap the benefits of being in a group of men similarly focused on the mission of bringing the Gospel to the World, the sharing of the fruits of their study and contemplation as a springboard to this, but the virtues of patience, meekness, kindness, and self-sacrifice are demanded on a daily basis for the common maintenance of priory life.
Since I had lived a rather independent life for a number of years prior to entering, the psychological switch from being in charge of my own schedule, finding fulfillment in outward activities, and being concretely focused on some academic goal or task (teaching or going to school in my case), was not a small one. Within community I was forced, in a manner, to sit still and charitably work alongside other brethren on very simple tasks, not all of my own choosing, and none focused on the end of making money so I could put bread on the table. This is a very healthy school of charity. Throughout the year whenever I felt challenged spiritually it was always an impetus to seek out the wisdom of the saints and return to the most basic and primary truths of the gospel. When I did this, I was almost inevitably blessed with a deeper understanding of Our Lord, of His message, and of its bearing on even the simplest and most human aspects of our daily life.
The challenge of community life is, in a way, the fruit of the challenge of the vow of Obedience. The vow of obedience puts you in necessary contact with and dependence on a vast network of people. Since our culture exalts self-will to the point of idolatry, taking a vow which binds you to rather let others choose for you the context in which you will do ministry runs counter to our instincts. It runs counter to our culture’s idea that I am in charge of my life and I will be whatever I desire myself to be. Not that the freedom to choose my life’s path is bad, mind you. Rather it is because it is such a good thing that it can be so easily abused. And it is because it is such a good thing that, when one undertakes a vow to forego, in a manner, one’s ordinary use of it, the power of Christ may dwell in a particularly effective way therein. The gospel may breathe freely where its adherents undertake heroic self-sacrifice. Married life obviously bears witness beautifully to this in the lifelong vow that each spouse makes to the other. Religious life bears witness insofar as one’s vow is made directly to God so that, despite this earthen vessel in which we dwell, the treasure of the Gospel may shine more clearly as the pearl of great value which Jesus desired all men to find.
I look very much forward to taking the next step in Dominican life. Nothing other than God’s grace can explain how I have come thus far. Please pray for our class as we take simple vows on September 1st, that the power of Christ may be made known through us and that we may be vessels to spark a desire for this treasure wherever we go!
The Prospect of the Vowed Life
Br. Peter Junípero Hannah
Saturday, August 11, 2007
“But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, to show that the transcendent power belongs to God and not to us.”
(2 Cor. 4:7)
